Come back to me.

If you could write a letter to yourself in the past or future, what would you write?
Lately I've been convicted of my activities and spending too much time in entertainment. I've missed church once already and I feel I would have given it more effort (It was pretty bad weather). I feel like I would have gone anyway for the joy in front of me surrounded by the people I love in worship and praise of my savior. I've been slipping lately. Whether it be eating habbits or entertainment, it seems like old habbits sometimes come back. So what does this mean?

Sometimes I think this is a result of a lack of justification in Christ. Where old things pass away and all things are new? I'm a new creation and am dead to my old desires. So am I not saved because old habbits die hard? My testimony is on the line here. Firstly, the Holy Spirit reminds me that whenever the topic of confirmation of salvation comes around Satan likes to tempt me that I'm not saved. Thank God for the Holy Spirit that works with us in such an amazing way. Honestly I don't know what I'd do without the Holy Spirit convicting me and sharpening me to be a man of God He's calling me to be. Secondly, I understand what I'm doing wrong. I'm relying on my own strength. As well as making excuses and worm-holes around the things I want to do. For example, "Oh I worked ten hours today, I'm entitled to spend the next ten hours on video games." -- WRONG.

I refuse to be a husband and/or father who comes home and checks out. So to answer my previous question. What would I do if I could write a letter to me in the past/future?

Say It was 2015, and I wanted to write a letter to the past, December 5th, 2011. I'd probably say something along the lines of, That I don't realize it yet but every moment given unto idols and stealing time away from what God has given you that are rightfully His; is a moment wasted. I'd probably have a little remorse wishing I gave it to Jesus sooner. But at the same time be in the joyful spirit of God that I eventually DID.

Say it was a month ago, November 5th, 2011 and I sent a letter to myself in December 5th 2011, I'd write mostly about keeping the faith, staying in the Word and be persistant in his fullfilling joy. I'd probably warn myself that new challenges will come but never forget to wake up and walk in scripture instead of waking up.. and walking to check your email.

Those who read this I appreciate your prayers. I'm not asking for any help, because God has already given me every thing I need but I do appreciate any words you have to say. I'm not too far off, just a little distracted lately and need to jump back into scripture. Starting now.

Oh my strength, where art thou?

Strength, where are you anyway?
Are you under this rock?
Are you hiding behind that tree?
What about behind that door?

I suppose this is blog is a new attempt to log my strength growth since I apparently can't find mine. Time to start from scratch.

The question I often ask is why I even look for my own strength when it is never sufficient enough? I've realized lately that it's actually not about my strength at all, but leaning on His.
"I can do all things in Him who strengthens me." Philippians 4:13

I'm still working out when I became justified and saved by His grace, but I suppose the most important thing is not when, but if. But as my story usually goes, I'll throw it in for the sake of argument. Three years. When I first came to First Baptist of Las Colinas I was merely a child, maybe eight years old. Circumstances came and went and I was absent from church for about twelve years. When the Lord brought me back to the same church I was soon saved.

Three years has passed, I'm now almost 24 years old and to my shame it's only been recently have I really given it all to Him. Not that I'm perfect, but there have been things in my life that I never fully gave to Him. Only having a desire, but never submitting. Finally, after years of struggling and wrestling with mostly myself, the Lord gladly wrapped his arms around me and said, "The healing begins now."

I will stray. I will fall again, but the Lord my Sheppard and his grace, mercy and all sufficient love will bring me back home.

Mr Rohlin once mentioned ever since he gave his life fully to the Lord it's been a rollercoaster ever since. He was right.. It's only been about three weeks, maybe a month for me.. and I feel as if I'm being whipped around, up and down, stretched out and sharpened to be the man He's calling me to be.

So here's to a blog, that others may find encouragement and edifying of the body through my trials. All for His glory.


Only, I repeat, ONLY because of His blood,

Jeremy


// P.S. - Hymn - Be thou my vision, Song - A life well spent, Testimony of Grace - Adam Bell and Lauren Bell. Sorry Grace, for not knowing right away. I love music, so a favorite tends to me a little tougher to decide right away. =)